Friday, August 1, 2008

Now, lets analyze the coaches that vote

Green means good choice, Red means bad choice

The USA TODAY Board of Coaches is made up of 61 head coaches at Division I-A institutions. All are members of the American Football Coaches Association. This season's board:
Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech
(good guy, knowledgeable)
Mike Bellotti, Oregon (ditto)
Bret Bielema, Wisconsin (young, but if you make jokes about being single while coaching in D-I, you are alright in my book)
Bobby Bowden, Florida State (he doesn't even know what his own team does, let alone a different team)
Tommy Bowden, Clemson (he's disqualified due to his dad)
Art Briles, Baylor (I think Art may be a wee bit too busy to worry about other teams)
Mack Brown, Texas (its like hating khakis, how do you hate someone that bland)
Neil Callaway, Alabama-Birmingham (UAB plays everyone in the Top 25 so he should know a thing or two)
Gene Chizik, Iowa State (not really restoring the non-existent glory)
Mario Cristobal, Florida International (I think I booked a flight on Florida International)
Sylvester Croom, Mississippi State (obvious pick)
Mark Dantonio, Michigan State (best Big 10 coach in Michigan)
Butch Davis, North Carolina (good coach, probably a dick in real life)
Todd Dodge, North Texas (disqualified due to Unneccessary Roughness)
Randy Edsall, Connecticut (built a program)
Phillip Fulmer, Tennessee (whatever Fred Thompson wants, Fred Thompson gets)
Jeff Genyk, Eastern Michigan (honestly, I have no idea who this dude is)
Turner Gill, Buffalo (solid season last year)
Joe Glenn, Wyoming (sure, why not. The name just sounds Wyoming-like doesn't it?)
Todd Graham, Tulsa (guess who voted for Tulsa!)
Jim Grobe, Wake Forest (obviously a good coach)
Dan Hawkins, Colorado (you start your son, you don't vote)
Pat Hill, Fresno State (what a football coach should be like - except for the poor records)
Butch Jones, Central Michigan (best football coach in Michigan - Sorry Dantonio)
Steve Kragthorpe, Louisville (U-G-L-Y year last year)
Mike Leach, Texas Tech (jackass personified)
Jim Leavitt, South Florida (also built a program)
Rocky Long, New Mexico (worth it just for the name alone - I guess Dirk Diggler was already taken)
Bill Lynch, Indiana (on probation - lets see how he does this year)
Doug Martin, Kent State (is it me or are there a lot of MAC coaches on here)
Urban Meyer, Florida (obvious)
Les Miles, LSU (dickhead but obvious)
Shane Montgomery, Miami (Ohio) (ANOTHER MAC COACH??? WTF)
Hal Mumme, New Mexico State (um...no)
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA (too gambley)
Tom O'Brien, North Carolina State (hardcore, good coach)
George O'Leary, Central Florida (too liey)
Gary Patterson, TCU (too underachievery)
Bo Pelini, Nebraska (he earned it, now prove it)
Chris Petersen, Boise State (too nice, everyone can't be #1 Chris)
Gary Pinkel, Missouri (complete jackass but he had a good year)
Mike Price, Texas-El Paso (seems like he probably goes to bad strip clubs)
Mark Richt, Georgia (obvious)
Mike Riley, Oregon State (super nice guy but he gets to stay on)
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan (yeah, he's out)
Greg Schiano, Rutgers (obvious)
Howard Schnellenberger, Florida Atlantic (great choice...in 1983)
Mark Snyder, Marshall (nope, he has f'ed up Marshall)
Frank Solich, Ohio (worthy even though its another f'ing MAC coach)
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina (nope, b/c he didn't vote for Duke)
Rick Stockstill, Middle Tennessee (I will actually let this one go b/c MTSU is good every couple of years)
Jeff Tedford, California (take that tree sitters)
Joe Tiller, Purdue (farewell tour so he can vote)
Bob Toledo, Tulane (not a chance in hell after running UCLA into the ground)
Dick Tomey, San Jose State (definitely deserves it)
Jim Tressel, Ohio State (obvious)
Tommy Tuberville, Auburn (don't bitch since you get a vote)
Charlie Weis, Notre Dame (no, no, no, no)
Kyle Whittingham, Utah (gonna be a hot name very soon)
Tyrone Willingham, Washington (nope, sorry Ty)
Ron Zook, Illinois (yes, for comedic relief)

1 comment:

Commish said...

WTF...no Navy coach? Didn't they beat the Golden Rimers?